


More of a Doctor Who Man

by lavenderseaslug



Category: Doctor Who (2005), Parks and Recreation
Genre: Gen, best bros
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-10-17
Updated: 2011-10-17
Packaged: 2017-10-24 17:06:52
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,320
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/265857
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lavenderseaslug/pseuds/lavenderseaslug
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>April and Andy happen upon Ben as he indulges in one of his favorite TV shows</p>
            </blockquote>





	More of a Doctor Who Man

“Dude, what is this show?” Andy says one night while Ben’s watching TV. “It’s so loud and there’s that weird noise all the time.”

“It’s called _Doctor Who_ and that’s the TARDIS.” Ben says, irritation sneaking into his voice.

“TARDIS,” Andy snickers and Ben rolls his eyes.

“It stands for ‘time and relative dimension in space,’ for your information, and it’s a time machine.” Ben pauses the DVD and Andy’s eyes bug out as a giant robot man is frozen on the screen.

“WHAT IS THAT? What _is_ that? Is it going to kill them? Who’s the Doctor? What’s he a doctor of? Is he a real doctor or just one of those people that have a fancy piece of paper that doesn’t mean anything?” Andy launches himself over the back of the couch and settles in, his eagerness fueling Ben.

“Those are Cybermen. They’re bad news for the Doctor, but he’s their biggest enemy. And the Doctor is his name. But it’s also what he does. He...fixes things. He travels through time and fixes things.”

“That sounds lame,” April says from behind them. “Unless he, like, goes to stop Pompeii or something.”

Ben turns over his shoulder to face April. “There’s actually an episode about that. Because sometimes you can’t change the past and that’s one of the difficult things that the Doctor has to deal with. There’s a fixed timeline and changing events would probably change it so the world wouldn’t even exist right now. It’s not lame, it’s actually a really interesting examination of one man’s effect on the universe.”

“Whatever. Does he meet anyone famous? Like Abraham Lincoln?” She sits next to Andy and sinks into the cushions with an air of absolute disdain.

“He does meet historical figures but primarily the show is set in Britain since it’s a BBC show. Can we just watch? You can probably figure it out.” His finger is inching towards the play button.

“So it’s just British people? That’s dumb.” April’s mouth quirks slightly in that way it does whenever she’s giving Ben a hard time.

“It’s better than anything that’s been on the American TV since _Battlestar Galactica_ went off the air.” Ben crosses his arms. “Can we just watch it?”

“I don’t know, Ben, it doesn’t sound very politically correct to me, which is something Leslie was talking to me about the other day. Can you say even TARDIS on TV?” Andy looks earnestly at his roommate.

“I told you, it’s an acron - you know what? Never mind. Let’s just watch it and see what happens, okay?” Ben pushes the play button, ending all discussion on the matter.

\- - -

They start watching _Doctor Who_ together every week. Ben doesn’t remember how it became a tradition, just that it is one now. They’ve worked their way through the first four seasons. Andy likes Martha the best, and April favors Donna’s no bullshit attitude, but Ben will always have a soft spot for that yellow-haired female, Rose.

Every season finale is an emotional affair in their apartment. April revokes the mascara rule because she doesn’t want anyone to see her crying (“It’s just allergies,” she scoffs) and Andy excused himself to refill the dishwasher (“That washer won’t fill itself...with dishes,” he says) and Ben makes a point of putting on his Batman costume whenever Rose is on the screen (“I’m treating myself,” he tells them).

The night they’re about to start the fifth season, Ben does his best not to launch into a dissertation on the differences between Russell T. Davies and Steven Moffat because they’re all still a little raw from David Tennant’s last episode. “It’s just...different,” he says as he puts in the first DVD.

\- - -

‘Speak in a Scottish Accent’ is a rule that reigns in their apartment for a week after they finish the first few episodes with Amy Pond. Andy refers to his roommates as MacBen and Wee Lassie April. Ben perfects his ‘och ayes’ and the speech from _Braveheart_ and April stubbornly says “Top o’ the morning to ye” despite Ben’s assertions that Irish and Scottish are two completely different accents and couldn’t she at least tell the difference between Craig Ferguson and Lucky the Leprechaun.

“We’re kind of like Rory and Amy,” Andy says one day, and April looks at him from half-lidded eyes. “I mean. He just loves her so much. And she loves him. And Ben’s like the Doctor. Our apartment is the TARDIS!” He’s so excited by this discovery that Ben lets him spend the afternoon making the creaking noises the TARDIS makes because he’s secretly thrilled to be compared to a Time Lord.

Leslie’s campaign for city council becomes peppered with slogans such as “Vote for Pawnee’s First Time Lady” and “Exterminate the Competition.” She doesn’t understand it, but Ben thinks once she wins, and if they ever start dating again, he’ll show her the first few seasons. He bets she’ll like Donna best.

\- - -

Andy wants to dress up as an Ood for Halloween. April says he can, only if she can be the TARDIS. Ben says he’ll be a sonic screwdriver, which makes Andy snicker.

April wears all blue and Andy wears a skull cap and some cooked ramen, and Ben has a custom-made sonic screwdriver costume from The Sharper Image. They go to the Parks and Recreation Department’s costume party and no one knows what they are.

“A TARDIS sounds like literally one of the greatest things a man could own,” Chris says as April blandly twirls a lock of hair between her fingers.

“Why should a screwdriver be sonic? There is nothing you can add to a screwdriver to make it more useful,” Ron maintains, straight-faced as ever while Ben attempts to assert the power of sonic.

“Is that...spaghetti on your face?” Leslie asks, reaching into her bag for the spare napkins she always has on hand for food-related emergencies.

\- - -

They finish watching the sixth season on the internet and Andy scratches his head the whole way through. Ben doesn’t blame him, and isn’t even sure he can explain the intricacies of a plot imagined by Steven Moffat.

“If you’re the Doctor, who’s your River Song?” Andy asks, and Ben isn’t sure he can answer. Not until Leslie’s done running for office, or he gets fired or retires. Whichever comes first.

“If you could pick anyone to be your lady TARDIS, who would it be?” April asks blandly. “Cloris Leachman? Betty White?” Ben isn’t sure he can answer that either, but he makes a point to remind April that he isn’t in the same age bracket as Cloris Leachman and Betty White.

\- - -

April and Andy go out one night, for a married people’s dinner (they’re going to Taco Bell because Andy says he wants to pay home-age to April’s roots. When Ben tries to explain that it’s not pronounced that way, Andy says it’s where April comes from, of course it’s her home, and she’s grown and aged since then, so the way Ben’s saying it doesn’t make sense at all). Ben stays at home and puts in a disc of _Doctor Who_ and leans back into the couch cushions to enjoy the Doctor in silence.

Just as the opening credits start, Andy and April come bursting into the apartment, bickering inanely about if a crunchwrap is better than a chalupa and if you could put both together into one dish. “This is why Pawnee is edging out Tulsa for the number three spot in obesity,” Ben groans loudly.

“Woah woah woah, are you watching the show without us? That’s our thing!” Andy says, stopping the argument in its tracks. “Pause it, pause it, pause it.”

“No, start it over. The beginning’s the most important part.” April’s bored tone belies her interest.

Ben complies as his roommates settle in beside him, and the whirring of the TARDIS fills the silence of the apartment.


End file.
